A Letter for Me in 20 Years

Dear future Arundel,

Imagining my future has always left me stumped and unsure. I don’t know what my life will look like in 20 years, and fixating on this uncertainty makes me anxious. However, I am learning to think about my future in a different light. Rather than attempting to imagine what environment I will inhabit, I am choosing to focus on the aspects of my future that I may control. I see no point in stressing over what my future career, home, family, or friends may look like because, oftentimes, those factors are out of my hands. Instead, I imagine what I will be like. 

I hope that twenty more years of living will provide me with more wisdom and peace. I hope that I learn to be more spontaneous while retaining stability in my life. I hope I can balance my needs with my relationships with others. I hope I gain the confidence and self-assurance to form long-lasting relationships and set boundaries between these people. I hope I preserve the friendships I currently have, but learn to let go when it’s necessary. I hope I am successful in my career, and that I never lose my passion for creativity. I know these things are immaterial and hard to define, but what I want to achieve most in 20 years is internal growth. I want to be open-minded and receptive to self-improvement. I want to be a better person to my friends and family, but mostly to myself. 

As I imagine what my future may look like, I know that the only person to control that future is myself. What can I do to achieve that internal peace and knowledge that I hope for my future? I know that life often happens in ways you least expect, and making predictions for your own future is a quick path to disappointment, but I think I have some control over my future. Every day is a closer step to meeting my future self. Every day is a chance to create the life I want to look back on one day. I don’t think my life is one long narrative; I think every moment I spend growing and changing is one pace towards my future.

Emily Dickinson wrote, “We turn not older with years but newer every day.” As I forge my future, I choose to view my life not as getting “older” but as becoming “newer every day”. The years and the time past do not matter so much if you take each day with a new perspective. Goodbye, future me, I look forward to meeting you!

Arundel Stevens (2024)